What is it, where do I find, does it really make women squirt? These are the most common questions we hear and this guide to the g-spot will answer all of those questions.
What is the G-Spot?
The elusive g-spot has been shrouded in myth and mystery for decades. The topic of whether or not it even exists has been debated for some time – some people claim that the idea of it was a myth propagated by phallocentric sexual experts (we’re lookin’ at you, Freud,) in order to make women feel like their inability to orgasm from vaginal sex was pathological. Then later, sexual health experts decreed that the g-spot was very real.
The “spot” isn’t a particular organ that some women lack and others possess in abundance. The g-spot is a cluster of nerves and tissue that becomes engorged with stimulation. The truth is that because the size, shape, and location vary between individuals, some will feel it and some will not. If you've yet to experience it, all hope is not lost!
How to Find the G-Spot
The first step in finding your g-spot is to make sure you're adequately aroused. Most women take an average of 30 minutes to become truly aroused. Don’t rush it – take your time, put on your favorite moody porn or read a naughty novel, and get romantic with yourself.
What makes your g-spot prominent is a gland that swells up with fluid (skene’s gland – female equivalent to the prostate gland). As you become aroused more and more, the skene’s gland expands, causing the g-spot to be more sensitive and bulge out.
What Does the G-Spot Feel Like?
Its texture will be slightly bumpy, not as smooth as the rest of your vaginal wall, and it can be anywhere in size from a finger-tip to a golf ball, generally with a distinct round-ish shape. It's hard but spongy, and the more aroused you get, the harder it will feel. Once you find it, you’ll definitely know.
I Still Can’t Find My G-Spot!
If you've done all the things but still can't find it know, it’s NOT your fault. Studies have shown that the size of the skene’s gland is different in all women. If yours is on the smaller side, it’s possible that it will never push on the g-spot enough to make it protrude.
What does it mean if you can’t find your g-spot? Just that you’ll want to spend more time on clitoral stimulation and other masturbation techniques. Believe us, plenty of women have satisfying sex lives without it.
Best Technique for Stimulating Your G-Spot
The most common way to stimulate your g-spot is to use the “come hither” motion. You know, calling someone over with your fingers. Try putting pressure on it and gently pulling it forward from underneath. Continue to experiment with different amounts of pressure and speeds. There’s no one size fits all when it comes to pleasure.
If you start to have a feeling similar to the need to urinate, that’s completely normal. In fact, it can mean that you’re nearing female ejaculation, aka squirting. If this makes you super uncomfortable, the best way to avoid this is to pee before g-spot stimulation.
Like all sexual organs, it’s possible to become over stimulated. If this happens, just take a break. Continue touching and teasing on other parts of the body, but take away some of the direct stimulation. Once you feel a bit more relaxed you can go back to stimulating the g-spot directly.
Experiment with Pressure and Motion
When stimulating the g-spot, every woman will have slightly different preferences. It’s important that you try different techniques, vary the amount of pressure and switch up your movements until you figure out what you like.
During partner play it’s also important to communicate with your partner and let them know how it feels when they do different things. You may find that as you’re nearing ejaculation, you may want to slow down the motion and slowly pull from behind the g-spot vs. keeping a faster rhythm like you would for a clitoral orgasm.
Ultimately, you have to experiment a bit to find what you enjoy the most. Do your best to just enjoy the ride vs. trying to make it to that end goal. The mind is the most powerful sex organ we have; try not to overthink everything.
G-Spot Sex Toys
Using sex toys to stimulate your g-spot can be especially helpful during solo play. Because it's located at the front wall of the vagina 2-3 inches in, it can be a bit hard to reach on your own. You might also find that you enjoy the vibration of a sex toy more than the pressure of your fingers.
Use a toy with a curve like the We-Vibe Rave. The cluster of nerve endings that is the g-spot is located about two inches back from the vaginal opening – which is why a “come hither” motion is preferred to find the location. Increase the likelihood of reaching the spot with a toy with a significant curve.
A heavier, weighty toy is going to directly massage the spongey mass that we all call the g-spot. A toy made of glass or stainless steel will be more effective for this purpose – check out the Icicles No. 4 glass G-Spot Vibrating Wand.
Get thrusting. The Fun Factory Stronic Drei is the absolute ideal design for the best orgasm of your life. The ergonomic shape, along with the toy’s innovative thrusting technology, will use pressure and vibration both to thoroughly stimulate the spot. It feels sooooooooooo good.
Sex Positions to Stimulate Your G-Spot
Because of the unique location of the g-spot it can be hard to stimulate during intercourse. Because it's only 2-3 inches in, it's likely that a straight dildo or penis will slip right past it never even making contact. If your g-spot is on the more pronounced side a member with a good amount of girth may be able to stimulate it without trying too hard. In general though, you're going to need to adjust your positioning to get direct stimulation through sex.
Make sure they're very shallow and on a slight angle. The higher up your butt, the better the angle for g-spot stimulation. A position-aid or sex furniture is the best way to accomplish this. You can slide it under your bum during missionary, or lean forward on it for more comfortable doggy style sex. The Liberator Wedge or Jaz Motion is perfect for both of these positions.
Also try girl on top and lean back a little. This will angle the penis toward the front wall of your vagina vs. being straight down the canal. The same goes for girl-on-girl sex when using a strap on. Try a dildo on the shorter side with a good amount of girth, and keep these angles in mind.
Another great way to stimulate the g-spot during intercourse is with a wearable couples' vibrator like the We-Vibe Sync. This is worn during intercourse, and stimulates the g-spot and the clitoris at the same time. It's not likely to make you squirt, but it might just help you experience a blended orgasm.